Down, Out and Up (a mountain)

Well after a good hike today amber and i are both feeling pretty depressed. It seems as though we are destined to be travellers for the rest of our days. Our restless souls cannot be tied to one place for too long. Whats worse? We really thought this time we found a place to call home- a place to stick around for a while, and some friends close enough to call a family. It may sound sudden, but it is certainly not. We have been supressing our unhappiness for a little while and trying to stay positive. Once the cracks in the illusion began to split though, we realized that we were merely outsiders and all of this time we have been supporting someone elses dream. I think that we really have a battle ahead of us, but how do we flee without burning this bridge?

Lately there has been some unspoken tension between us all and Lori confronted us about it all tonite. We explained that we've been feeling very homesick and that we also don't feel that we fit in well here. As much as we love the outdoors, camping, hiking, and nature, we are city people. We love the multicultural mix of people, the liberal ideas, the diversity in the city. We love taking long walks, chilling at coffee shops, being in the music and art scene. At first she seemed to understand, but by the end of the conversation I think she seemed more frustrated and defensive.

I guess the cards play out how they do no matter what you try to do to avoid it. I just hope its in the cards to survive this one and keep our friendships, because after all of the misadventures we've been through, it would at least be nice to take something with us, especially something as meaningful as a friendship. But it looks like it is out of our hands now. We can only be honest in saying that we belong in a city, not on a mountain, and if the people who asked us here cannot understand why we are not happy being here, then i don't suppose there is much we can do to make them understand.